Visit the Safe Relationships site for domestic violence resources.

Initial Abuse Inventory:

Symptoms of Abuse -
Threats; Power Misuse; and Control......

What symptoms below fit your life?
Using Emotional Abuse
Putting the other down ___
Making the other feel bad about themselves ___
Calling the other names ___
Making the other think they are crazy ___
Playing mind games ___
Humiliating the other ___
Making the other feel guilty ___
Using Privileges ___
Treating the other like a servant ___
Making all the big decisions ___
Acting like the master of the castle ___
Being the one who determines the roles ___

Using Economic Abuse
Preventing the other from getting or keeping a job ___
Making the other ask for money ___
Giving the other an allowance ___
Taking the other's money ___
Not letting the other know about or have access to family income ___

Using Coercion and Threats
Making or carrying out threats to do something to hurt the other ___
Threatening to leave the other, to commit suicide, report the other to welfare ___
Making the other drop charges ___
Making the other do illegal things ___

Using Intimidation
Making the other afraid by using looks, gestures, or actions ___
Smashing things ___
Abusing pets ___
Displaying weapons ___

Using Children
Making the other feel guilty about the children ___
Using the children to relay messages ___
Using visitation to harass the other ___
Threatening to take the children away ___

Using Isolation
Controlling what the other does, who they see and talk to, what's read, and where they go ___
Limiting their outside involvement ___
Using jealousy to justify actions ___
Minimizing, Denying, Blaming ___
Making light of the abuse and not taking the other's concerns about it seriously ___
Saying the abuse never happened ___
Shifting responsibility for abusive behavior ___
Saying the other caused it ___

HAS ANY OF THE FOLLOWING EVER HAPPENED TO YOU?
Does your partner:
* Blame everyone else especially you, for his or her mistakes? Yes___ No___ * Prevent you from seeing your family or friends? Yes___ No___
* Curse you, say mean things, mock you or humiliate you? Yes___ No___
* Force you to have sex or force you to engage in sex that makes you feel uncomfortable? Yes___ No___
* Restrain, hit, punch, slap, or kick you? Yes___ No___
* Intimidate or threaten you? Yes___ No___
* Ever prevent you from leaving the house, getting a job, or continuing your education? Yes___ No___
If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, you may be in an abusive relationship. Please call your local police department or local Domestic Violence agency so they can assist you in obtaining warrants, orders of protection and counseling.


Lynette is a National Certified Counselor and a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor in the State of Illinois. 

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